Supercars: Gen 3 Plans “Coming Along Nicely” As ‘Leethal’ Lee Sent To The Farm

Bryan Firebrand | Chief Editor | CONTACT With the pelicans “running” Supercars still pretending the whole Mark Larkham thing is just a bad dream and doing f**k all about it “due to the holiday period”, they have miraculously managed to find time in their busy fishing schedules to f**k over Tickford and Lee Holdsworth.  The news comes after Supercars, in their infinite wisdom, decided that … Continue reading Supercars: Gen 3 Plans “Coming Along Nicely” As ‘Leethal’ Lee Sent To The Farm

Supercars: Pelicans Make Larko An Offer He Can’t Refuse

Bryan Firebrand | Chief Editor | CONTACT In what might be a sign that the giant pelicans running Supercars are starting to listen to the fans, in their own unique way of course, reports are coming in that they might have made Mark Larkham an offer.  The Waterton Chronicle understands Head of Supercars Paulie the Parity Pelican called Larko today to outline the new plan.  … Continue reading Supercars: Pelicans Make Larko An Offer He Can’t Refuse

Supercars: Pelicans Announce New Technical Regs In Effort To “Simplify Series”

Bryan Firebrand | Chief Editor | CONTACT After launching Mark Larkham for being “too technical” with his brilliantly simple explanations of technical details, and launching Riana Crehan for no apparent reason, other than her husband drives a Ford, Head of Supercars Paulie the Parity Pelican has today continued his campaign to attract the  2-6 year old demographic.  Speaking from the fort he built out of … Continue reading Supercars: Pelicans Announce New Technical Regs In Effort To “Simplify Series”

Supercars: “Fans Too Stupid For Tech” As Larko Punted

In what looks suspiciously like an attempt to finally put the series out of its misery for good, the absolute giant pelicans running Supercars (into the ground) have today doubled down on their decision to launch Mark Larkham and Riana Crehan. Head of Supercars Paulie the Parity Pelican told The Waterton Chronicle the decision to get rid of Mark Larkham was an easy one.  “Basically, … Continue reading Supercars: “Fans Too Stupid For Tech” As Larko Punted

Supercars: What Ever Happened To Renee Gracie Starting Her Own Race Team?

Bryan Firebrand | Chief Editor | CONTACT With the news that Lethal Lee Holdsworth might be about to become the Will Davison of 2021, and lose his Tickford seat through no fault of his own, the absolute legends at The Waterton Chronicle got to chatting about potential replacements.  Earlier this year Renee caused quite the kerfuffle in the mainstream media with the revelation that getting … Continue reading Supercars: What Ever Happened To Renee Gracie Starting Her Own Race Team?

Supercars: “We’ll See About That” Says Paulie After Will Davison’s Praise For DJR Pace

Supercars: “We’ll See About That” Says Paulie After Will Davison’s Praise For DJR Pace   Bryan Firebrand | Chief Editor | CONTACT Following a successful test day at Queensland Raceway, Will Davison has praised the DJR (no more Team Penske, get over it) Mustang, with words to the effect of “yeah it’s f**king quick”.  Unfortunately for everyone, his comments have apparently come to the attention of … Continue reading Supercars: “We’ll See About That” Says Paulie After Will Davison’s Praise For DJR Pace

Formula One: Lewis Hamilton Not Happy With “Unfair” Turkey Conditions

Bryan Firebrand | Chief Editor | CONTACT Basically guaranteed 2020 World Champion (Valterri, it’s James….) Lewis Hamilton has spent the time between the end of qualifying in Turkey and right now having a massive whinge about how slippery the circuit is, and is apparently calling it “unfair to the fans, unfair to me, unfair to Roscoe, unfair to vulnerable people everywhere, man.”. Apparently Lewis’ main … Continue reading Formula One: Lewis Hamilton Not Happy With “Unfair” Turkey Conditions

Supercars: Jack Smith ‘Feels Bad’ For Fabian Coulthard

Bryan Firebrand | Chief Editor | CONTACT Expert at binning it for no apparent reason, and usually backwards, Jack Smith, has apparently weighed in on the predicament facing Fabian Coulthard, as the former DJR Team Penske driver’s options for 2021 continue to diminish.  The giant Pussy.. Cat Dolls fan has opened up to The Waterton Chronicle about Fabs’ plight, and shed some light on where … Continue reading Supercars: Jack Smith ‘Feels Bad’ For Fabian Coulthard

Supercars: Fabian Coulthard Applies For Safety Car Driver Position

Bryan Firebrand | Chief Editor | CONTACT Reports are streaming in from a flood of speculators, as usual, that Fabian Coulthard is being vetted for the coveted position of Safety Car driver after his stellar performance in the role at the 2019 Bathurst 1000.  Sources familiar with the situation have told The Waterton Chronicle that with Fabs’ chances of securing an actual racing car seat … Continue reading Supercars: Fabian Coulthard Applies For Safety Car Driver Position

F1: Yanks Not Keen On Going Back To Vietnam, Saudi Arabia All Good

Bryan Firebrand | Chief Editor | CONTACT The American monopoly men running F1 have today made what they’ve called a “cautious decision”, given the history.  Despite announcing the race over a year ago, the whole COVID thing provided a convenient excuse for the American-owned series to avoid Vietnam again this year, much to the relief of the yanks running the show.  And now it seems … Continue reading F1: Yanks Not Keen On Going Back To Vietnam, Saudi Arabia All Good