Supercars Fans Call In Archaeologists To Investigate Demise Of Series

Bryan Firebrand | Chief Editor | CONTACT

Following the absolute clusterfxxk of a race that happened at Darwin today, where for reasons no one can explain to anyone, James Courtney managed to finish second, and those who copped pit lane penalties somehow managed to finish ahead of those who only copped time penalties, a group of old school fans have enlisted the help of Tony Robinson and his Time Team crew to attempt to dig up the Supercars of old. 

Speaking to The Waterton Chronicle, Tony explained the magnitude of the task ahead. 

“Basically, we’ve got three days to locate the remnants of what was once a glorious series, but seems to have been buried under years and years of mismanagement, money-grabs and misguided parity campaigns.” the history buff explained. 

“Given the time constraints, we’ve decided to focus on two main areas to try to work out what went wrong. Renowned archaeologist Phil Harding will be digging deeper into the role of the pelicans who ran the show into the ground.” Tony continued. 

Apparently the investigation will also involve Professor Alice Roberts digging an even deeper trench on the other side to see if we can uncover how exactly the pelicans ever thought that making up new rules and dishing out arbitrary penalties to stop anyone who dared challenge the might of Triple 8 and Holden was ever thought of as “a good idea”. 

“These pelicans were clearly out of control.” Alice told this reporter. 

“And it looks like they might have burned the whole thing down as a result.” Phil added. 

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