NZ: Election To Be Delayed Until Jacinda Leads Polls

Bryan Firebrand | Chief Editor | CONTACT

With coronavirus hysteria sweeping the western world, Supreme Leader Jacinda Ardern is apparently pretty keen to use the crisis to try to avoid the inevitable absolute bollocking she is about to receive at the General Election later this year. 

“What we’ve realised is if we go to an election, we’re pretty much fxxked.” Ardern explained. 

“So we think it’s best for everyone, particularly me and the Labour party, if we just don’t have an election for a while. We need more time to re-educate people who reckon they’re not voting for us.” she added. 

The Waterton Daily Chronicle understands the election, currently planned for November, will be pushed back until such time as people stop even thinking about voting for someone other than Labour. 

“We’re constantly assessing the polls and identifying people who might be an “opportunity for re-education.” Ardern explained. 

More to come.