Angry Mob Barricades Scomo’s House Looking For Toilet Paper

Bryan Firebrand | Chief Editor | CONTACT

With the bushfire crisis now a distant memory for angry mobs everywhere, one such group of woke warriors has found the next big newsworthy topic to blame entirely on Scomo, toilet paper. 

Or more specifically, the lack of it. 

Not even slightly put off by the supposed deadly threat of coronavirus, an angry mob consisting mostly of vegans and other assorted riff raff with predominantly purple hair assembled en masse outside Prime Minister Scomo’s house last night, after a solid drinking session at wherever degenerates go to rehydrate . And boy were they angry. 

Carrying signs with such witty slogans as “Scomo Is Scumo (sic)” and “Down With Fascist Scomo”, the group sat around on the footpath outside Scomo’s house for a good hour before one of them remembered why they’d turned up there in the first place. 

“Oi! We should probably do something!” he announced as the clock struck 3am. 

“Mmm, hmm, ugh, nah” was basically the response from the group. 

With the entire group apparently losing interest in trying to steal whatever toilet paper Scomo might have had, the group decided it was probably easier to just head across the road to the Macca’s and use theirs.