Mustang Wings Clipped In Effort To Restore “Parity”

Despite neither car being named after any species of bird, Supercars have today announced that the Mustang will have its wings clipped in a clear attempt to stop Roland Dane crying. 

Supercars’ Head of Parity, Paulie the Parity Pelican announced this afternoon that in an effort to avoid the “drama” of last year, where the Mustang was initially homologated by Supercars but then won a few races and in doing so caused Roland to start whining, Supercars had “taken a more “proactive” approach for 2020.”.

“We learned last year that fans noticed when we deliberately tried to stop the Mustangs winning, so this year we’ve decided to be a bit more sneaky about the whole thing.” squawked the seabird. 

When The Waterton Sports Chronicle asked Supercars Head of Motorsport and completely neutral former Triple 8 employee Adrian Burgess what he thinks parity means, he said “all teams are equal, definitely, it’s just that some teams are more equal than others.”. 

“So we’re just trying to ensure that Triple 8, I mean, the best team, wins.” he added.