Local Idiot Causes Existential Crisis After Going Too Far With Conspiracy Theories

Dramatic scenes have unfolded in a Facebook group for truly unhinged conspiracy theorists today after a group member completely abandoned critical thought in the pursuit of “believing”. 

The incident unfolded after completely sane Dan Smith questioned whether the cult members honestly believe their claims that the Australian government deliberately lit the catastrophic bushfires using giant laser beams in a bid to clear land for a high speed rail line that no one wants or needs, and that they also use a giant weather-control weapon to push cyclones away to stop the rain putting the fires out. 

After a heated argument about laser beams and Photoshop, one of the cult members then claimed that the government is also using a giant weather-control weapon to push cyclones away to stop the rain from putting out the bushfires. 

“If you don’t believe, you’re just a bigot and a fascist” screeched 28-year-old unemployed Newcastle man Wayne Kerr. 

“I suppose you believe that Australia doesn’t exist too?” asked Dan.  

Not wanting to concede that a conspiracy theory could possibly be complete garbage, Wayne reached peak tinfoil hat status. 

“What? You think it does exist? What an idiot lol” he replied. 

And with the universe unable to cope with Wayne existing in Australia and Australia simultaneously not existing, the dedicated “believer” disappeared in a blaze of photons and puff of smoke. 

“Wooo, it was trippy as bro” said a witness.