The Vegans Are At It Again, This Time Blaming “Pyromaniac Cattle”

After making themselves look like absolute dicks yesterday by labeling firefighters “wife-beaters”, and then copping another setback when it turned out that the bushfires in NSW and QLD were all deliberately lit, the vegans are it again. 

Not content with just shutting up for a day or two, now it’s random members of the livestock community that are under fire. 

A spokes-human for the Militant Vegans Against Everything League told this reporter they were “deeply, deeply offended” by the Australian cultural institution that is the Bunnings sausage sizzle using its popularity to help out people in need. 

“It’s disgraceful that they’re selling sausages to raise money to stop a bushfire when a random post I saw on Facebook said it is in fact cattle that started the fires.” they said. 

“Everyone needs to do some research of their own and stop trying to establish a link between people deliberately setting fire to bush, and bushfires”.  

“It’s clear to us that the real cause of these fires is cattle with lighters and matches. Oh and climate change. Oh and, all white men” they added, while clutching at some perpetually reusable straws. 

“Basically Bunnings and the firefighters are making money off the illegal activities of some pyromaniac cattle” she shrieked.