Barnaby Joyce Reckons 9 Year Old Firebug “Probably Just Doing Some Back-Burning”

Following reports a 9 year old on a day off school because of the bushfires entertained himself by setting a paddock on fire with his dad’s blowtorch, Barnaby has come out swinging for the second time today, defending the little angel, and suggesting he was just trying to help. 

“Look, I commend the young lad to be honest. At least he’s having a crack” said Barnaby’s mouth before his brain had a chance to intervene. 

“If more bored kids had taken the initiative to light random fires before this whole thing blew up, we might not have had to bother with the whole explaining what we’re doing about climate change thing” he added. 

“At least he’s spending time outside” said the model dad. 

A government official told this reporter they had to be careful about being too quick to criticise the child. 

“We feel that he was probably just expressing his individuality, and we all need to respect that” he said. 

No firies were available to comment, because apparently they’re all too busy actually trying to deal with the situation.

More to come.