Our Supreme Leader has today reassured New Zealand that ISIS is definitely a threat to us all, just months after disarming everyone except gang members and other criminals in the wake of the Christchurch massacre.
In what appears to be an attempt to scare the crap out of everyone, Jacinda insisted that ISIS would definitely have a go at New Zealand, and when they do, we should all just smile at them and hope for the best.
She went on to explain that if things got really bad we could always ask the Mongrel Mob to give us a hand.
“They’re armed to the teeth” she chuckled.
“If anyone does have problems convincing an ISIS terrorist not to behead them or something, just head down the road to one of the gang headquarters and ask if you can borrow a couple of sawn off shotguns if they’re not using them at the time” she advised.
“I really don’t see what the issue is, I’m sure we can all get along”.