International Rugby Board Rules England “Too White” To Challenge Haka

As New Zealand begins the long road to finding its national identity again after getting comprehensively spanked in the Rugby World Cup semi final against England, the IRB has decided to make themselves look like dickheads too by fining England for daring to challenge the haka. 

Despite not getting even close to fining nations like Tonga or Samoa for actually properly challenging the haka in any previous fixture, IRB bosses have for “some” reason taken exception to England having a half-hearted crack by walking a few metres up-field. 

IRB representative and social justice advocate D’Lainee Farkov said it just didn’t feel right that “some European players were behaving in a threatening manner toward people of colour”. 

He went on to explain that it was irrelevant that half the All Blacks team are of European descent, because “they obviously identify as indigenous in that moment, whereas the English players are just entitled  rich white men”.